I am ready to book my first live streaming radio talk show. Lets Talk Research & Reunions. Share your success story live with the world! Shout out your search for your long lost family member! Book your spot with me now!! We are ready to air Sunday evening at 6pm! Whose gonna be my first guest?
If you are interested on being on the show please fill out the form below with your Topic or Story you want to discuss. I will respond with a tentative date and time, but I will contact soon after that for updated info on the schedule to confirm your time spot.
Whats on the Discussion menu:
*SHOUT OUT WHO YOUR LOOKING FOR-Live
Live interviews with success story clients
DNA matching and searching on ancestry
Fears and hopes of adoptees and birth parents searching
and much more!
** Dates of broadcast, special guests, and how to find the show online will be posted soon!
I only need the basics to get started. All the finer details we can personally discuss if you check the "Yes - Char Call me" option so I can interview you with detailed questions, talk about any non id info or other documentation you may have and all the options available for a successful search. Otherwise, all questions and conversations will be by email and saved to your case file as the search progresses.
DON'T WASTE ANOTHER MINUTE DEBATING "IF" YOU SHOULD DO THIS.
Take my word, there is such a thing as "too late". Don't play the "what if" head games, If your already thinking about it, then its time to do it! You always have control of the final outcome, but you won't if you don't.
Today while researching yet another adoption case to locate an adoptee whose birth name was Daniel Harrison, when I googled that name, an article talking about "forced adoptions" popped up. Just the term "Forced Adoption" had me wondering, what on earth is this about? So I click on the keyword which redirected to a Facebook account in which the first post was titled, "The latest from Daniel Harrison". I learn quickly that Mr. Harrison was an adoptee, just not the one I'm looking for. However, I continue on reading through this Facebook page because now that I'm here, I am very intrigued to learn more about the Forced Adoptions of Australia.
Continuing down the posts, I stop at on a hyperlink post,http://www.firstmotherforum.com/,which is described as Birthmother/First Mother forum. Because the term Birth Mother grabs my immediate attention due to my profession, I become curious of why this post is on this Facebook page, and so my curiosity follows the link. I don't see anything about "forced adoptions" at first, but I continue slowly scrolling this site, which is rich with interesting stories. Finally I come to a headlined titled, “Canada to pay millions to victims of forced adoption in 'scoop' era". WHAT?! I stop promptly due to every word I see in this sentence that has more than two letters, now has my COMPLETE ATTENTION.(Go ahead, I know you want to go back and re-read the sentence without the two letter words). Now that you see what I see, let’s go learn what this is all about!
Click here and read the article and get a little history lesson like I just did, and learn about how white people of power made a decision thought to be of "good intentions" for Native American children, because they believed they would have a better life if raised by white families. Sadly, this was NOT THE CASE for most of them! Many of these children were confused, afraid, longing for their families, their culture and way of life, butsuddenly and without warning, were now "Force to be Adopted" by white families. They were forbidden to talk in their own language or practice any of their "Indian lifestyle ways", not allowed to dress “Native” and was to learn the “white way” of life, not necessarily the right way.
SOUNDS LIKE EARLY HUMAN TRAFFICKING TO ME!
This is the era when Indian Schools came into play back in the day! Now I can understand if they were taking children who were orphaned, or desperately poor and starving, but this was far from the truth for many, as described by an Adult Native American man, name St. John in the next article I was led to when I reached the ”sources" for the previous article. St. John reports that he was “snatched” at 4 years old, along with 3 brothers. He had more siblings, but they “escaped”.
LOST BIRD a.k.a ZINTKALA NUNI
While reading St. John’s story, I come to learn of the term “Split Feather Syndrome” described in a paper by Carol Locust,” as the damage caused by loss of tribal identity and growing up “different” in an inhospitable world, also referred to as “Lost Bird. Lost Bird derives from one of the earliest Indian adoptees, a Lakota infant who survived the 1890 massacre at Wounded Knee. She was found crying (a very weak cry) 4 days after the massacre, under the frozen corpse of her mother! She was claimed as a war trophy by a general who later adopted her (more of a political gesture it is believed) and named her Lost Bird, according to her biographer, Renée Sansome Flood in her book titled, “Lost Bird of Wounded Knee”.
This article was simply not enough for me. I needed to know more about this young lady. What became of her after adoption? Did she return to her people? Did she go on to have children? How long did she live? So I googled it.
The first link I clicked on was from the blog of author, Joan Gage. Her title description is why I chose it, because she added one captivating word, “BETRAYED”.
Still, after reading her article, I needed more about Lost Bird! I opted to find a documentary about her and even more so, I need to share it with all of you! Her story is one that the world SHOULD know about.
The first step is to start your family tree. This is where you will add important information as you go, such as birth dates, death dates, marriages, children born, newspaper clippings and more. Even if you're adopted, start a tree with what you know, even if that is just your adopted name. There are other steps to follow that will help fill in this tree. Adoptees will probably end up with 3 or 4 trees, researching possible leads, but this is a good way to keep track of what you have already unfolded. Consider your family tree, your work space or billboard of information.
The next step I suggest is to submit an autosomal DNA test with Ancestry.com, FTdna, 23andMe or My Heritage. I personally prefer Ancestry.com. However, if you are a male seeking a birth father, then I strongly suggest to also invest in a Y-DNA test, which is specifically for the paternal line. This is how you can uncover "surnames" to investigate. Click here to learn more about Y-DNA tests.
Note: Adoptees, a DNA test will provide you with substantial clues, however, if it is paired with your "NON-ID"information that you obtain from the adoption agency or vital records department in the county you were born in, MAGIC can happen! The smallest clue can lead you in the right direction. Read about my Non ID and DNA case.
Besides, your NON ID is all about you and your adoption. You are entitled to it and should have it! Some states may require a "compilation" fee. I know Wisconsin's fee is $45-75 with an option for you to have them do the search as well (I personally would hold off on that and just request your medical and non id info for now. You can always hire them at a later date. Save some money and see what you can discover on your own first). ALWAYS CHECK to see if your birth parents signed a waiver to release their identity, if you were to inquire to find them. You can also submit a waiver to release your identity to them if they inquire to find you. Click here to learn more about NON ID information.
Understanding the "cousin connection" in DNA results
Ok, so your DNA results are back and you just don't understand how every match is a cousin! Each generation match (2nd cousin, 3rd cousin) has 2 - 5 different possible charts that could fit your match. To determine which chart you should use, pay attention to the age difference between you and your match. Let's say you were born in 1973 and your 2nd cousin match was born in 1954. Considering a generation is about 15 - 20 years in distance, your match would be 1 full generation older than you.
I work these charts backward, so Where it says "YOU", put the name of your match and where it says "your match", put your name. Why....because browsing the family tree that your match provided (work with a match that has a family tree posted), you can work backward in time, to the top left column box (ancestor - usually a grand parent) under the top main centered Grand parent. The top centered box (great (x) grandparent) simply signifies that the top box in each column below are siblings. One of the siblings of the person in the top left hand column box above your match, is the connection that is going to lead down to the person you are searching for. But don't trust just one match...you want to work a chart on a minimum of 4 matches and find the common ancestor, or "proof" that you have the correct branch! I suppose you can work the chart either way, I have just always started with the DNA Match on the left side.
There is a lot of time involved in working these charts, especially the further back in time you get, the more siblings there seems to be. Families were baby making machines back then! (giggle) But be patient and be consistent with documenting your information in that family tree, so you dont research the same person twice! You will find matches that you will just never find out how they connect, and that may be due to an adoption or name change. Records were not kept as accurate then as they are today. This is why WE as researchers today TAKE NOTES. Keep at it and you Will FIND your family member.
One more suggestions I would like to ad, is newspapers.com. I have found so many wedding announcements, obituaries and crime reports that name other family members you may not have know even existed. So be sure to cover all angles. Newspaper articles have been a HUGE resource for my searches. And let's not forget the whole "google it" reference. Try it once and just google your name and location and see what pops up. Or for adoptees, google your birth date, location and the word "adopted". You just never know what may be out there on a world WIDE web!
Hope this helps some of you in your searches. When all else fails.....THERE'S ALWAYS CHAR! 🙂
Another Year passing and another beginning and you are still on the fence about searching.
How long have you been contemplating searching for your relinquished child who is now an adult, your birth parents or birth siblings? What is holding your back in your decision? Fear of rejection? Fear of unraveling their present lives? Afraid you were kept a secret? Afraid you won't like what you find?
Listen, FEAR is a four letter word that can cause you to procrastinate so long in your search that worse things could possibly happen mean while, putting your chances of a success story at a higher rate for a "solved by sad ending story". Life is continuing from the moment of decision in whatever your particulars are, people are moving, changing, families are expanding, people are aging and getting sick, and some even dying.
In my experience as a researcher, I have witness several cases that waited too long by even just one day before death took the person they were searching for. For one particular client, leaving his heart heavy and full of regrets that he didn't choose to look sooner, because his counterpart was equally searching for him and he never knew it; she had passed just the day before he made the call! Unfortunately nothing is powerful enough to turn back time, so don't let time be your enemy, let it be your friend and place fear outside your heart.
Of course, not every case with be sunshine and roses, but you have to be a strong person and prepare yourself for any outcome, by giving yourself the benefit of the doubt and awarding yourself the pride of being courageous enough to seek and find the answers that have shadowed in the back of your mind your entire life. What ever those answers may be, you will finally have some kind of picture emerging out of those shadows.
Some people live a life a regret that they made the choice to relinquish a child, but paralyzed by fear to find them because of the laws, fear they may be despised by the now adult child or what the adopted parents emotions and actions may be. And on the other hand, some birth parents had their children removed due to negligence, abuse or because they just decided parenting wasn't for them. We cannot change who our parents are or why this choice was made, we were not given a choice of who we would be born to, but as an individual, we do have the choice of how we will be as person, a parent, a friend, and employee AND we have to believe that people can change. We don't know the whole truth or circumstances that surround the decision that was made or made for them. This is where the bravery to know the truth and the courage to face it comes in. When you find you have finally reached that point, I am here to help you along your journey the entire way. It's important to know someones in your corner.
If you notice on my website usfamilyfinders.com, the main header picture, also pictured below this post, is a family that I helped reunite. The siblings met just in time before one of them passed with stage 4 cancer. I can not express enough that time doesn't have to be your enemy. And your choice to search for your truth is yours alone, is your decision and no other person in the entire world has the right to deter you from it or criticize you. Sometimes YOU JUST NEED TO KNOW to find your own peace.
When and if you are ready....REGISTER YOUR SEARCH. ITS FREE AND THE FIRST STEP IN YOUR NEW JOURNEY AND TO A NEW FRIENDSHIP WITH ME!
Logging into facebook today, I find yet "another" success story of DNA brings a family separated by adoption, back together! Just one more reason WHY YOU SHOULD SUBMIT YOUR DNA to ancestry if your adopted. DNA DON'T LIE! If you're looking for true answers...this is one great place to begin. I included the link below to Michael's success story radio interview.
Are you a Wisconsin birth mother, Birth sibling or other birth Family member seeking an adoptee? As long as you have at least 3 correct of the 5 basic information details I need, I can find your loved one!
This is a flat-fee-based search due to the fact that Wisconsin is not yet a digitized search indexed state, and all records will have to be manually researched (requires travel), documented and investigated until we find your absolute match.
To initiate your search just simply register on our site and "opt" to pay the down payment to begin search immediately.