Wisconsin Adoptee Find Guarantee clarified.
I GUARANTEE THAT I WILL FIND YOUR ADOPTED CHILD’S AMENDED NAME OR YOUR MONEY BACK – for real!
Birth Family Seeking an Adoptee
KNOW YOUR ADULT ADOPTED CHILD’S NAME WITHIN 1 MONTH and THEIR CURRENT LIFE STATUS AND LOCATION IF AVAILABLE!
I guarantee that I can find your adopted child’s amended name (birth record). Of course I cannot guarantee I will find where he or she now lives, as sometimes people die, vanish for no reason at all or may even be in “Witness Protection”. (This is very rare, but possible). Common sense will tell you that, so please don’t come back at me with “you guaranteed you would find them”. I did my job, and the fact is that I did find the name of the person you are looking for and now you know it too. Their current life status and location I will also deliver if possible. I will cover every corner I come by to try and do that, but sometimes, people just disappear for several reasons. However, you will now know their name and that is more than you knew all these years!
I will check the death index and the SSDi.
I will check marriage records, possible 2nd adoption and legal name change.
I will check public records for last to current living locations if available.
I will check public newspaper articles for all family member names.
If they cannot be found…….
THIS IS JUST A ROAD BLOCK AND NOT A DEAD END
What can you do now that you have this information. You can contact the vital records department and order a non certified copy of your Birth certificate since you are a biological family member and now have the BC#. I usually supply this for my clients.
You can write a letter to the Adoption Research Program in Madison and request an original copy of the amended birth record since you can now provide them with a birth certificate number and prove you are a related. You may still have to petition the court if this is important to you, but keep in mind that the laws may still prevent this. But anything is worth a try! ***It has just come to my attention that Wisconsin laws have changed and if seeking a birth parent, and they are in fact deceased, they will release their identity. This may also apply to a sibling seeking an adopted sibling or parent seeking their adopted child. I have not validated this myself, as of yet, but if they are infact deceased, I would think they would release that information to you as well.
Even though your adopted family member is now an adult and free to make their own choice on whether they want contact with you as it is no longer the adopted parents choice, this is still a very fragile situation that demands respect for a person’s privacy. Tread lightly and try to do things in a respectful, tasteful manner. I know your eager to find your loved one and have longed for them for many years, but we have no idea how they actually feel about it. They may in fact have been looking for you as well, they may not want to have contact (and you need to respect that, but leave your information in the event they change their minds at a latter date. This happens more often than you know), or they may just not be reachable due to reasons we cannot control.
- You can write a letter to the adopted parents or siblings explaining who you are and politely ask them what became of your family member. Explain your story and how long you have been searching. Leave your contact information for them to respond to and pray they are kind people that will understand your longing and will contact you.
- You can request the Wisconsin Adoption Research Program to forward the letter if preferred out of respect for the family and the laws (they may charge a fee or even deny if there is a no contact order in the file).
- If you decide to send the letter yourself, I suggest sending a “certified and registered” letter to the family member you are addressing if you are writing them directly. Do NOT under any circumstances show up at their door step unannounced or repeatedly call them. There are protections and harassment laws that apply. My suggestion is go through the state, they will notify them that you are aware of who they are, since you have done the research to identify your family member (and most of them are aware that this day could come). Try to keep it as legal and respectful as possible.
- Most people are now on the largest network in the world, Facebook. I have reunited many this way, and it’s worth a look to see if you can find your family member there and send them a friend request accompanied with a private message.
- I can also send the letter for you if you prefer, as I will not release the adopted parents current address or phone number out of respect of their privacy, and this protects you from putting your neck out there. I understand that this information can be found on the internet and if you come by it on your own, please refer to step 3.